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Have a day. That`s about as inspirational I get.
People who go jogging, you realise we have cars now, right?
Share this if you are weird and don`t care
Just in: Chinese people confirm they were just messing with us with chopsticks. "You guys look like dumb idiots lol" says one Chinese guy
I`m first world poor. That means I have a smart phone and laptop that I use to go online and see that I have no money in my bank account.
Turning on your lights and siren after you lose a drag race is just poor sportsmanship.
FUN FACT: I can fit 17 Pringles in my mouth. SAD FACT: I tried to figure out how many Pringles I could fit in my mouth.
A shark will only attack you if you’re wet.
I don`t understand those couples that fight and a minute later change their facebook status to "single." I fight with my parents but you don`t see me change my status to "orphan."
Sorry I missed your call. I took too long to answer because I was dancing to the ringtone.
My life is about as organized as the $5 DVD bin at Walmart.
I`m a big advocate of the `You started it` method of defense in an argument.
I trust Snapple facts more than CNN and Fox News.
Holy sh!t Karma, how much longer till we`re all squared up?
There should be a law requiring the cashier to high five you every time you buy a box of condoms.