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If people are what they eat, some people must eat a lot of stupid.
We can operate a robot on another planet, but yet I`m still struggling to get this vending machine to take my wrinkled dollar.
It`s actually pretty impressive how many poor decisions I can fit in a day.
Match dot com, but for socks.
I’m the kind of girl that would eat Doritos on her wedding day & accidentally wipe her hands on her dress.
You ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you’ve had?
Right now my life is about as organized as the $5 DVD bin at Wal-mart.
I get a lot of “You must work out!!!” I just wish it wasn’t from doctors. :(
I believe in the silver rule of life: Do unto others then run!
Hard liquor because I don`t don`t have time or patience to sit around drinking 9 bottles of wine every day
I`d be the stripper that got fired for eating her way out of the cake instead of jumping out of it.
Okay I`m going to workout. Should I post about it now or after I`m done?
If I’ve learned anything from these ghost hunter shows, it’s that everyone speaks English after they die.
Santa gets all the credit and I get all the debt.
A coworker gave me an invitation to her wedding in case you were wondering why this paper airplane I’m making has lace on it.