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My minivan is always rocking, but it`s usually because I`m trying to smack one of the kids in the backseat while I drive.
Match dot com, but for socks.
Some people are training as complainers like it is a competitive sport
One time I snuck a whole rotisserie chicken into a movie, cause candy is for amateurs.
Before criticizing my taste, remember that I like you.
I watched my first silent movie the other day. The kids weren`t there.
The only person whom a woman listens carefully & follows sincerely & does exactly as he says is a photographer
joined a nudist colony last week ... the first few days were the hardest!
Next time a conspiracy theorist says, "That`s what they want you to think," say, "No, but that`s what they wanted you to tell me."
I finally found a simple and easy way to deal with my weight problem. I threw my scale out.
My participation in this meeting will be based solely on the snacks they provide.
The one thing you can always count on is your fingers.
Miley Cyrus is not unique. I have been having full body spasms and licking random objects for decades.
People in sleeping bags are the soft tacos of the bear world...
Better to be incredibly weird than incredibly boring.