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Just did 100 crunches. Crumbs everywhere.
Still waiting for the day I can illegally download groceries
Not to brag, but I can spend hours coming up with reasons not to do something that takes 5 minutes.
I don`t always agree with everything I say. :)
If you like to make love while listeninag to music, always choose live album. ..That way you`ll get an applause every 3 to 4 minutes. :)
Helpful Tip : Never ask the cop to hold your beer while you dig out your drivers license.
What if cell phones are part of an elaborate plot to rid the world of phone booths so Superman has nowhere to change?
Step 1: remove food from packaging Step 2: dig packaging out of trash to locate cook time
I spend so much time on the internet, that the priest pronounced us husband and wi-fi.
I just threw a piece of food on the floor of my cubicle. Totally forgot my dog doesn`t work here.
i have noticed you notice me noticing you
Bran flakes. Helping pants fit better for over 100 years.
Sometimes, even I`m afraid of the things my mind comes up with.
Running away doesn`t help your problems, unless you`re fat. Then yeah, run away.
A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted.