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To understand paranoid people better, follow them around
There`s nothing better than a nap after a good nights sleep.
Dont piss me off...I`ll give your number to all the kids and tell them it`s Santa`s hot line!
Finding friends with the same mental disorder as you ... Priceless
You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”
So Monday and Tuesday sucked. But, with the right mix of caffeine, alcohol and mushrooms, Wednesday doesn´t even have to happen at all.
I tried my best to see things from your point a view, but your point of view is stupid.
I remember when the internet was two tin cans and a string.
No thermostat is as effective at regulating temperature as sticking a foot out from under the bed covers.
50 Shades of Laze - My weekend plans
Happy 15th birthday google, 3 more years and you will be able to search for adult sites legally
I think it’s funny when dogs hide under the bed when they’re scared. I’m like “you idiot, that’s the first place monsters go!
The fact that you don’t find me amazing doesn’t bother me at all, it just confirms what I have suspected all along; that you have bad taste.
Good For OJ, he gets to take another stab at life..
I don’t know who or what is doing it, but one day I will find the thing that continues to steal one sock and destroy it.