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I would like to wish all of the groundhogs a very safe and happy Groundhogs Day.
Some people are like water balloons; they`re more fun when you throw them out the window.
Finger Prints on Super Bowl Trophy to be used in dozens of criminal investigations
I`m starting group meetings at my house for people who have OCD, not because I have it, but surely one of them will be bothered enough to clean it.
Anyone says their wedding day was the best day of their lives has obviously never had 2 candy bars fall down at once from a vending machine
No matter how little I do in a day. I always feel like I could have done less.
Hi, im _____ but you could call me sexy.
I found out last night that the only thing worse than waking up 3 times to pee is sleeping right through it.
Go ahead caller 9!!
If opposites truly attract, the correct life strategy is to be a complete loser.
Why do guys cheat on pretty girls with ugly ones...?
No horror movie can surpass the sensation of touching your pockets and not feeling your cell phone.
When I was a kid, my parents told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, this is called "Identity Theft".
Getting another set of teeth would be much more useful at age 60 than age 6.
If you love something,, let it go..... That`s EXACTLY what I`ve done with my body....