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I`m going to make a bucket list: Things I`m going to do before I kick the bucket. Number 1: WEAR SHOES!!!
I’d like to think I’ve taught Citibank a valuable lesson about handing out credit cards all willy-nilly.
Radio Shack has stayed in business with a name combining something no one buys anymore and a type of building no one wants to go into.
Akward Moment Is When Your Twin Sister Calls You Ugly(:
Hmmm… Who should I stalk on Facebook now? :)
I`m afraid of a world run by adults who were never spanked as kids and got trophies just for participating.
The average man thinks about sex every tits seconds
Firemen, Astronauts, and Doctors are the only people who actually followed through on what they wanted to be when they grew up.
Anyone who knows me obviously knows a shit ton about awesomeness.
Ate too much salad yesterday so I`m going on an Oreos cleanse today.
I am proud to say that I have completed the 1st item on my bucket list... I got the bucket
B!tches be trippin ... OK, maybe I pushed one.
She says I keep pushing her buttons. If that were true, I would have found `mute` by now.
One dog was admiring another dog`s leash, and said, "I admire your restraint."
There`s no way that whatever mothballs prevent is worse than the smell of mothballs.