Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I gotta ask you a sirius question....do you know the muffen man
Adding lyrics when you don`t know the words or making words up when you don`t speak the language. ;)
Fun Fact: Even though they call it a "man hole", you can shove women and children down it just fine.
That awkward moment for a guy when he`s at a urinal stall and another guy takes the stall right next to him when there`s plenty of other perfectly good stalls farther away..
Let me drink about it and get back to you.
I`m happy that my grandma thinks that a iPad is for wet and leaking eyes
I’m pretty much always down for a snack.
I hate when I put food in the microwave & it starts makin explosive noises so I check and it’s cold like why you gotta play me like that.
Worried that you may have a stalker? Shut up and just be happy someone likes you.
If a clown farts, does it smell funny?
I don`t care how old I am, if I go out to eat and there are crayons and paper placemats with puzzles... game on!
My favorite part of a marathon is watching the reaction of runners who grab my plastic cup of vodka.
I`m on that “Starts tomorrow” diet.
Your trophy wife is more of a participation trophy wife, isn`t she?
Relationships are not a test... So why cheat?