Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My Chinese waiter put my food down in front of another white guy who looked nothing like me. I get it now.............Wait, That`s not my waiter!
Crazy? ... My therapist does say I should quit talking to myself.
It`s impossible to look like a bad ass while eating a snow cone.
If this cold snowy weather doesn`t clear up soon, I may never get in the mood to take down the Christmas tree-
If Harry Potter is so magical then why can’t he fix his eye sight?
As a child, my mom told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, this is called "Identity Theft".
WTF, marathoners? I don’t even like to drive 26 miles.
A quiet man is a thinking man. A quiet woman is usually mad.
So far, I am 100% at believing what happened next on Facebook links.
I`ve just realised that I`ve got one of those cool body types that can eat whatever I want and get fat.
I wish I could commute by roller coaster.
Donuts: An excuse to eat cake for breakfast.
Quick question, ladies: If you shave your eyebrows off and then draw them back on, what the hell are you doing?
It`s amazing how different the phrases "alcohol free" and "free alcohol" are.
You call it camping. I call it getting drunk with insects.