Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sometimes knowing exactly where you are does not make you any less lost.
Basically the way it works is I tell myself I`m not going to eat too much and then I eat too much.
A walk of shame is always sad. Don`t make it worse by adding the sound of Flip flops to it.
i don`t care if u don`t like me ........... i am not a facebook status:D
I`m just a guy struggling to find the appropriate level of inappropriateness for every social interaction I`m unlucky enough to be a part of
A man in front of me at Walmart is buying a pregnancy test. I bet this is the one time in his life he wishes she had sent him for tampons!
My Ex updated her status to "standing on the edge of a cliff" So I "poked" her!
Shouldn`t we get paid to use the self-service checkouts in supermarkets? It`s like we work there for a little while.
Judging by the amount of times I accidently cut myself on sharp objects it`s probably just as well real lightsabers aren`t available yet.
First comes love, then comes marriage. Then comes not making any decisions and feeling guilty about asking for blowjobs.
Not one back to school special on beer. What kind of world do we live in.
Due to Global Warming Santa will be giving out Solar Panels to all the naughty kids this year!
I swear my toddler yells at me in Vietnamese
It’s getting really annoying how eating makes you gain weight..
Remind me why I work 40 hours a week to be this poor?