Daily Silly Status

Vodka is the answer...but I can`t remember the question.

You think you are too small to make a difference? then you have never spent a single night with a mosquito.

Basically the way it works is I tell myself I`m not going to eat too much and then I eat too much.

I love Halloween because it`s the only night of the year I may end up getting drunk with Batman and going home with a cheerleader.

The WWF advert asks, “When the ice goes, where do the polar bears go?” ... Well, swimming, I suppose.

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it´s still on the list.

I hate it when you`re buying stuff off the Internet and the bank calls to check to see if your card has been stolen. Sure, it seems nice, but then you have to explain to lady on the phone that no, it was not stolen, you really are the one who bought a subscription to bustyblondes.com

FUN FACT: I can fit 17 Pringles in my mouth. SAD FACT: I tried to figure out how many Pringles I could fit in my mouth.

Fact: No woman has ever shot a man while he is doing the dishes!

Hi everyone! Welcome to AA. This is a "judgment free" zone...unless we`re talking about Janice who ate all the cookies last week.

I`m about 0 for 300 in looking for safes behind wall paintings

Trust me , as you get to know me , i just get weirder.

Mister Rogers didn`t adequately prepare me for the people in my neighborhood.

I think I may be getting harder to love.

What if Spider Man has to stop a crime in the countryside