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Nothing like responsibility to ruin a perfectly good day.
My goal in life is to have a psychiatric disorder named after me.
I swear I heard my dentist whisper "yolo" as he reached for a chisel...
Me- We need eggs. Hub- How many? Me- One. See if they will sell you just one.
Four out of five voices in my head are saying this is gonna´ be a great day.
But what if bygones want to be something else? ;)
Eat whatever you want,and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight ...Eat them too..!
When one door closes, another opens ... I had a Chevette that was like that.
Always look both ways before crossing a woman.
is bored of being bored because being bored is boring.
Make yourself indispensable at work by hiding everything.
No, whenever there`s trouble, YOU always seem to be around ... officer.
Your pants say yoga but your a$$ says McDonalds!!
Why is it called Boob Sweat and not Humiditties?
I always write `wake up` on my to-do-list so I can at least accomplish one thing a day