Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Your life must really suck when no one even likes the catfish version of you.
I wonder if "Sober Me" knows that "Drunk Me" can Breakdance?
Sometimes I don`t go big just so I can go home.
Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pac Man, for 25 cents that bitch would swallow balls til she died!
Okay, I can`t take it anymore. What in the hell holds the blocks up in Mario Brothers?
You know what’s funny? Lot’s of sh!t. Loosen up already.
Does Facebook have a β€œYou’re not smart enough to be talking about politics” button?
A touching letter by a little girl to Santa on Christmas: Dear Santa, Please give clothes to all those poor ladies in daddy`s laptop
My husband and I are having a serious fight. Do you think I should let him know about it?
Girls with tattoos on your tits, Why? We`re already looking at them.
Can I have your number or do you just want the 8 dollars for the drink?
Inspiration: nobody else knows what the hell they’re doing either.
When suffering from insomnia I either count sheep or ask my girlfriend how her day was.
The biggest lie I tell myself is: β€œI don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”
Dear karma, I have a list of people you missed.