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You can make your life more entertaining by simply reaching out, and getting to know a whore.
I worry about what my rubber ducky thinks about me when I`m naked 0.0
Boobs: because you can`t suck on a girls personality
I will be posting telepathically today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.
I`ve got good news and bad news. The good news is this status is almost over. The bad news is you read the whole thing.
When people start praying before a meal, I close my eyes and imagine how far I could throw a potato if I really put my heart into it.
If I didn`t procrastinate, I probably wouldn`t do anything at all.
What kind of wine goes best with laundry?
Instead of ‘gay friends’ can we say homiesexuals
Had a great time watching the family oriented PG rated Shrek with my grandson last night... until he asked why a Donkey would have sex with a Dragon.
Not so great minds also think alike.
These energy drinks make sitting on the couch so much more exciting.
TIP OF THE DAY: If you can`t afford porn, just turn on tennis and shut your eyes.
I used to be poor. Then I bought a thesaurus, and now I`m impecunious.
I like to listen to mexican radio but I dont know what they are singing or saying so I just pretend they are singing about how awesome I am.