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I always get naked before I get in bed so I don`t know why this lady at Sears is giving me a dirty look in the mattress section.
I am a completely different person when I`m not under female supervision.
I have one question about Insanity, "Are we there yet"?
"Lazy" is a strong word. I prefer to call it selective participation.
Friend told me that on her strict new diet, she eats each meal naked in front of a mirror. I said would you like to come over for dinner?
I would be so pissed if someone shook me all night long.
Apparently, when people say "I could use a hand" it doesn`t mean they want to get slapped in the face.
WANTED: Someone to follow me around and whisper "You`re an adult" every few minutes.
I hate it when people radiotype us blondes as dumb.
I just blew all my party money on bills again
I hate laundry, dishes, sweeping, mopping, dusting, fixing and fetching. The only logical conclusion is that I am descended from royalty.
I just "borrowed" my neighbors nissan frontier, they make that trick look easier on the commercial
This is not the status message you are looking for .... Move along
When I was younger my dad showed me pictures of why to wear condoms during sex. The funny thing is, they were all pictures of me.
You know it was a good sh!t when you come back and your screensaver is on.