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I carved my name in a fruitcake in 1982. If anyone gets it this year, post a pic!
I once found a whip, a mask, a baton and handcuffs in my Mother-in-Law`s draw... who knew she was a superhero. Nice!!!
According to Facebook, some people I don`t remember are grilling this weekend.
[the instructor clearly frustrated with me on first day of veterinary school] "It doesn`t matter if its a dog, it`s still called a cat scan"
All the coffee in Colombia couldn`t make me a morning person.
I’m a proud supporter of messy hair and sweatpants.
Gray hair is the human body`s equivalent of low toner.
You think your life is bad? I’ve got that “Five dollar foot long” song stuck in my head
Searching Netflix is almost more of an activity than watching a movie on Netflix.
If I could time travel, I`d make sure the guy who made up the word Walkie-Talkie got to name more things.
Too bad the little guy "Tattoo" from Fantasy Island isn`t around anymore. They could ask HIM where the plane is!
Thought I was having deja-vu. But it turns out, I do the exact same things every day.
I turned out ok for a kid raised in a large part by Bugs Bunny.
Adam didn`t take any crap from Eve. He wore the plants in that relationship
Some people walk into your life and leave footprints on your heart. Some people walk into life and make you want to leave footprints on their face