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Tomorrow the world shall be ours! Until then, good night my evil minions!!
Facebook is the best place to say whatever you want. If it doesn’t go over well you can just say you were hacked.
I followed my heart...now I`m at the liqour store
Turns out if you fake your death every monday work catches on.
I have decided to leave my past behind me.. so If I owe you money..I’m sorry. but I’ve moved on.
shoutout to people who have money but still order off the dollar menu
Iwent to Office Max to buy a drawing board, but they were sold out. I guess it`s back to the....oh rats...
I`m not giving the kids a time out. I`m giving myself one. The thought of sitting in a corner & being ignored sounds just heavenly.
My wife and I are pretty upset. It looks like someone broke in and surfed porn on my computer. They didn`t touch anything else, so that`s good.
SEX! Now that I got your attention. I just wanted to say, "Have a great weekend!"
How much tequila goes into mashed potatoes again?
If by "crunches" you mean the sound potato chips make when you chew them, then yes, I do crunches.
Sign in a grocery store: Take lettuce from top of stack, or heads will roll!
If you can`t say something nice about someone, you probably know the same people I do.
"I’m definitely going to do that tomorrow.” — Me being delusional