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Of course I talk to myself. I need to have an intelligent conversation every now and then.
cable TV.... helping us avoid Presidential speeches for nearly four decades
Organized people are just too lazy to look for things!
Worry: a waste of imagination.
There’s no excuse for my behavior, so I’m drinking until I have one.
Wanna screw with your idiot friends on Facebook? Post that Obama passed a law to stay in office a third term this morning. Praise Jesus.
Must be my day for Mis-Advertizing --- I just ate a Bowl of Cheerios ----- and they DIDN`T make me Happy!!!! FML!!! :-P
Women aren’t that complicated. They just want an honest and genuine guy who will give them insincere compliments they might not deserve.
I hate that feeling when you feel you wrote something good on facebook and then nobody likes your status. Depressing... :(
Very productive day today, turd-wise
This century is already 15% over.
In the 60`s we took LSD to make the world look wierd. Now the world is weird and we take Prozac to make it look normal.
I try not to laugh at my own jokes. But we all know I`m hilarious.
I don`t have a drinking problem. If anything, I`m TOO good at it.
Constantly losing socks in the laundry but finding change. So logically there has to be a sock fairy.