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is cuddling up with a good book and a cup of tea. Ah, who am I kidding... IΒ΄m looking at Hustler and having a beer.
I love screwing with the minds of the foreign tech support guys. "My name is Perry, not Terry. With a P as in Pterodactyl."
I just watched a puppy do something really cute. It was like a real life YouTube video.
Must be my day for Mis-Advertizing --- I just ate a Bowl of Cheerios ----- and they DIDN`T make me Happy!!!! FML!!! :-P
Don`t act like your not impressed.
The best stories ever told always end with the words”…and then I got the hell out of there.”
If you were home alone in the middle of the night, and you heard a fart, would you laugh or be scared.
The only way I know if I’ve bought enough beer is if my car thinks I have a passenger.
Do you ever feel like you`re in Season 5 of your life, and the writers are just doing outrageous stuff to keep it interesting?
props to the parent at the mall that walked up afterward to ask santa what his kid wanted lol
I got 99 problems but a least my name aint North West.
My favorite sex position is, "don`t tell anyone we did this".
thjeo oskl asopa joa sajksla wioj apska shul bhcgy ....Yes I just wasted your time ;)
Every time I go to the bank I ask if they are giving out any free samples.
There’s no such thing as being ready for vacation to be over.