Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Some call it alcoholism, I call it "keeping my emotions hydrated"
Stress balls really work when you shove them down someone`s throat.
Some days, the supply of available curse words is insufficient to meet my demands!
You can`t lick any part of your reflection except your tongue.
My kids can be difficult sometimes, but my mom always assures me that I deserve it.
500 + friends... and not one of you saw where I put the remote?
The day I can get a correct order at a fast food establishment is the day I will support an increase in minimum wage.
Sometimes it’s just easier to eat the last slice of pizza than fit the box in the fridge.
This looks like a job for Superman! -unemployed Superman reading the classifieds
The best black Friday deal ... sleep - $0.
my boss told me to start the presentation with a joke,so I showed my payslip.
You`re an intellectual who doesn`t read books? I completely understand because I`m an athlete that rarely moves.
The key to a successful relationship: Tools > Internet Options > Clear history.
Remember, I`m always here if you need shoulders for your ankles to lie on.
Spruce up your weeknight: run the dishwasher and imagine you`re on a cruise!