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Besides creating dinosaurs are mosquitos good for anything?
Life can be like Chess sometimes. I don`t know how to play Chess.
Let`s run away together.. Lol jk, I don`t run anywhere.
Hmmmm what should I buy myself for Valentines day.
The Internet makes things so convenient. Before it existed, if you wanted to order a DVD online, you had to invent the Internet.
CNN needs to reevaluate the use of Breaking News. Perhaps "Latest Speculative News" or "We Really Don`t Know Shit" would work. CNN call me.
I`m not drunk ... But I`m working on it.
I want to follow my dream, but i dont want to look like a stalker
You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
If you want to keep a secret from me, put it inside a Facebook event invitation.
Porn is the one industry where segregating races, genders, sexual preference, is completely acceptable
If you are the one who stole my computer yesterday, please disregard the folder labeled, "Nature photographs." Thanks.
I`m not getting married till Pizza Hut allows gift registry.
I may be too old to cut the mustard, but I can still cut the cheese.
Arm wrestling is DEFINITELY the manliest sport where Two dudes hold hands...