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"You`ve got a friend in me." - Cannibals, probably
Meanwhile, Somewhere farther down on your timeline, your aunt just posted the "Footprints" poem on your wall again.
I regret nothing but mostly because I can`t remember most of the stuff I should probably regret
Man what a day. I pulled my groin...for like 20 minutes.
Pretty much always 3-5 seconds away from just laying down wherever I am.
The hardest part about being an adult is trying to hide how you`re still a child.
Anything can be considered your job if you hate it enough.
One things for sure, I can always count on my fingers.
How did anybody express anger before the invention of the caps lock key?
About to check Facebook? Let me save you some time. One of your friends has updated their cover photo to a picture of the beach.
The filling in this fortune cookie tastes like paper...
Should hallways in mental institutes be called psycho-paths?
Whoever said “There is nothing as precious as a child’s laughter” obviously never fell down a flight of stairs in front of his kids.
We got an extra day this year. Why did it have to be a Monday?
I don`t use cocaine, I just like the way it smells.