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What`s it called when you always have a sweet tooth, but it`s only for booze?
I`m only 2 girls short of a threesome.
Ironically, Internet was made to save our time.
I get so confused when I`m about to watch a TV show or movie and "For Mature Audiences Only" appears on the screen. Can I watch or not?
My life is just a series of awkward moments separated by snacks.
My kids keep bugging me about dinner, even after I keep telling them I already ate.
Give a fish something for once for f*cks sake
There are times, when I actually am hungry like the wolf. But thanks to Duran Duran I can`t tell anyone without sound like a complete f*cking idiot
The worst about the weekend?? The ending part.
I am really thankful that I have a desk job. I could never get all my personal stuff done at home.
I want to live in a world where the Food Network delivers.
people say that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, but it`s the only way I can talk to you.
Great friends never let you do stupid things......alone
Fun Fact: Over 97.8% of men have already made mistakes this year that a woman will remind him about for the rest of his days.
I say No to drugs but they... won`t listen.