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People reckon I´m too patronizing (that means I treat them as if they´re stupid).
Redneck Word : debate...i was gonna go fishin today but forgot to bring debate
I`m lucky to be broke at a time when minimalism and sustainability are in style.
We spend so much money on buying different clothes... without realizing the best moments are spent without clothes
Stalking is when two people go for a long romantic walk together but only one of them knows about it.
Karma takes too long ..... I`d rather beat the sh%t out of you.
The difference between beer and your opinion is that I asked for a beer.
I think even hospital gowns cover more than my insurance does...
I`m old enough to remember when apparently the worst thing life could hand you was lemons.
Relationships are like just-out-of-the-oven pizza. You know it`s going to burn you, but it looks so good and maybe this time it won`t?
Cookies and porn are always better when they`re homemade!
That last phone call with my wife was so boring, I feel like I owe the NSA an apology.
"Nothing there? Better bark at it." - my dog
Ignoring things don`t make them go away, it makes them drunk dial you.
When finding someone to date, drinking compatibility is more important than you think.