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What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them?
They say swearing is due to limited vocabulary. I know thousands of words, but I still prefer`f*ck off` to `go away`.
My spouse thinks I`m crazy. But I`m not the one who married me.
"I really should buckle down and get my rap album going"-Me, every time I drink
Miracle Whip is a bit of an exaggeration if you ask me.
My wife is pissed at me again...appearently I am breathing wrong.
Every semicolon I have ever used has been a complete guess.
Nothing ruins a perfectly good mood like reality.
There`s a word for people like you and that word is "leave."
I wish I could match my dog`s excitement to go outside.
heyy lol
You know you are desperate for an answer when you look at the second page of Google.
After a night of heavy drinkin’ there’s one thing I can’t stand… and that’s up.
I try to always be the bigger person by hanging out with a lot of short people.
My sister borrowed my favorite shirt without asking again, so I changed her Facebook profile picture to a positive Clearblue pregnancy test.