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I like to respond to statuses with .. WOW, Someone needs a Happy Meal.
Saying, "We need to talk," is the most efficient way to freak someone out
Sometimes I spend whole meetings wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.
The sucking moment when you wave to someone & they haven`t noticed you & all are watching you & you feel why you waved in the first place & still you run after the person to stop & say HI
"Safely remove USB." Who does that?
Iβm surprised more people donβt Photoshop a cleaner house into the background of their pictures.
Mary had a little lamb,,the midwife fainted
Do transformers have health insurance or car insurance???
She texted me: "your adorable." I replied: "no, YOU`RE adorable." Now she likes me, but all I did was point out her typo.
I`m sorry officer, I thought you wanted to race.
"User Friendly" is just another way of saying stupid.......
I say the things better left unsaid.
If I make you breakfast in bed. A simple `Thank you.` is all I need! Not all this `How did you get in my house?` business!
If you live up be 100, you should make up some fake reason why, just to mess with people⦠like claim you ate a pinecone every single day.
I don`t own a thesaurus, is `cock meat` a synonym for `fried chicken`?