Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
How easily you’re offended is directly proportional to how dumb you are.
Let me get this straight…a woman could pour hot wax on her legs, ripping all the hair out…and still be afraid of a spider?
I try to avoid nice people, so they can stay that way.
Whoever has my voodoo doll, please scratch between my butt cheeks..I`m in public.
I`m pretty sure whoever coined the phrase " rise and shine", doesn`t do it anymore.
Despite the old saying, "Don`t take your troubles to bed," many women still sleep with their husbands.
I celebrate 4/20 on January 5th, because I know how to reduce fractions unlik the rest of you morons.
people say i talk in my sleeep , but no one at work seems to notice
Don`t put off until tomorrow what you can avoid the rest of your life.
I am Looking for a Bank which can offer me these Two Services..... .Give me a Loan & then Leave me aLone. :)
I like calling the Psychic Hotline and asking them what I`m wearing.
I have to be funny because being hot is not an option.
I`m disgusted by the thought of people updating their status while sitting on the toilet like I am right now.
I had a wet dream about you last night. Yeah, I was drowning you in a lake.
You call it camping. I call it getting drunk with insects.