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Ladys have it easy, if they ever do start to loose an argument they can just start playing with their boobs
I need my decision making privileges taken away.
If you can`t fix it with duct tape or beer ... it ain`t worth fixin`
Whenever I read: "Do not exceed recommended dose" I always think, "Challenge accepted!"
If at first you don´t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
I sometimes worries about my short attention span, ...but not for very L... hey! ... look at that squirrel!
Yes, autocorrect, that`s right. I hate that stupid ditch
bitches want what they cant have..or thats what I keep telling myself
While wearing a bikini you show 90% of your body -But men are so polite, that they stare only at the covered places.
I`m giving up procrastination for Lent ... starting tomorrow.
New rule: If I hold the door open for you and you walk by without thanking me I`m guaranteed at least one attempt on trying to trip you.
I finally did it. I gave my cat a bath today. It really wasn`t that bad. She enjoyed it. I enjoyed it. Other than the fur sticking to the roof of my mouth, it went well.
One thing that I have never had in the glove box of my car, is a pair of gloves.
Women are like bacon, they smell great, taste delicious and kill you slowly. Men are like bacon because we`re pigs.
Don`t cry because it`s over. Smile because it happened. -Me, to my empty pizza box