Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Pizza is my favorite winter activity
Why is it that everyone you hate has such a better job than you?
I see you`re busy. I`ll come back later and ruin your free time.
Life would be so much more fun if there were random Dukes of Hazzard style car ramps along the drive to work.
Yes we`re friends on facebook but that`s where it ends, stop trying to talk to me in real life... mom
I always honk when I drive by homeless guys sleeping, just in case they overslept for a meeting
Traffic jams are more tolerable if you just think of them as really boring parades.
Shout out to old people for graduating high school without Google.
If you have trouble getting your children`s attention, just sit down and look comfortable.
I’M ENGAGED…..to be hungover tomorrow.
"I know im the best driver on the road" thinks every guy.
Free snow at my house. Shovel all you want!
I was the hot single in my area the whole time.
I`ve been married twice. The next wife I have will be someone else`s and she can just go home when she`s mad at me.
Carrots may be good for your eyes, but alcohol will double your vision.