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Sticks and stones may break your bones. Also good: lead pipes.
Sorry I wasn’t ignoring you I was just watching 7 seasons and 54 episodes of this new show I found.
Well, if anything, the Mayans did teach us one valuable lesson. If you don`t finish something...it`s really not the end of the world.
I bet you 20 dollas I`m broke
Woke up this morning and the alarm clock was laughing at me....then I realized it was upside down and the time was 7:07
If you can´t amaze people with your intelligence, confuse them with your bullsh*t
Beauty is only a light switch away...
Reckon the first person to make popcorn by accident probably ran away
All who post weather maps on FB. You know we have the internet too, right??
Paintball is much more fun when the other people at Walmart don’t know we are playing.
There is no such things as ghosts. I know, I asked Santa Claus
People hate facing the truth. Luckily the truth doesn`t give a sh*t.
Dear Ninja Turtles, Why are you wearing masks? There are no other giant, mutated turtles. No one`s gonna mistake a different turtle for you.
You don’t have to be drunk to love me, but it helps
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 300,000 times, well then you`re probably a weatherman.