Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Remember the bridge you drive over today was built by the lowest bidder.
Dang girl,, Are you a Snickers bar? Because you`re so sweet and satisfying and surprisingly long lasting,, hold up,,,, are those nuts?
Types of like on facebook: 1.Stalker like. 2.Crush like. 3.I wanna bang you like. 4.Agree like 5.Pity like.
I use to be addicted to soap, but now I`m clean
I saw the most beautiful painting at the store the other day … but then I realized it was a mirror.
"I`m sorry" and "I apologise" mean the same thing...except when you`re at a funeral.
I propose a toast to the booze for making life seem tolerable.
Facebook is proof that people should not be allowed to name themselves.
Guys are at their mathematical best when a girl says she is pregnant. Agree or nah??
I don`t get it. If violets are blue, why do we call them violets?
If Tetris has taught me anything it`s that errors pile up and accomplishments disappear.
If you have to use a shot glass to make your drinks then you`re not doing it right...
I bought a book called `How to become an expert at Origami`. So far, I`ve made 1000 paper snowballs.
“That’s funny” is something I say when I can’t even fake a laugh.
Truthfully, I`d like you all a whole lot better if you were bacon.