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A lot of people are very competitive when playing stupid.
Guinness for breakfast because its Ireland somewhere.
If you cry loudly enough at a Walmart everyone will just assume you work there.
If Apple made a car, would it have windows?
You offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
Size does matter-just ask Pluto.
I just want you all to know, whatever problems you might be having, I`m here to `like` them.
There`s a word for people like you and that word is "leave."
When everything is coming your way ... You`re in the wrong lane.
People are like slinkeys; they don’t really serve a purpose, but you can’t help but laugh when one of them falls down the stairs.
If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
I was enjoying our conversation. Until you started talking....
Buy all your socks in one color - problem of the missing sock solved!
I`m sorry I slapped you but you didn`t seem like you would ever stop talking and I panicked.
I am a gentleman, based on the clubs I go to.