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I’d be more motivated to work out if the stationary bikes had a little basket to hold my snacks and beer.
The guy below me obviously doesn`t know that R2-D2 is in movies, not television
Chicken salad with egg in it is my fave way to eat two generations.
Can you imagine the reactions 25 years ago if you showed someone a photo album of pictures you took of yourself in the bathroom?
My most frequent walk of shame is from one bathroom to the other with the plunger
Life Tip: Tell your guests your house was just broken into and fake cry, they will clean it for free!
I`m not sure if this woman in the Starbucks line ahead of me is ordering a drink or casting a spell.
I’m “had to actually call a girl on the home phone to ask her out while hoping my mom didn’t pick up and start dialing” years old.
Exercise makes you look and feel better naked ... But, so does Tequila
Touch my food and suffer the consequences.
Use a mirror and you will find, PI.E = 3.14
Spring cleaning: The term that gives us an excuse to only clean once a year.
I can`t seem to convince these dogs & cats that I don`t need their assistance in the bathroom.
I imagine some people are like...: `should I take the shower?...no...I`m taking the train today...`
When someone hands you a flyer, it’s like they’re saying here you throw this away.