Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If there is no chocolate in heaven...I AM NOT GOING!
People who go jogging, you realise we have cars now, right?
If everything goes as planned, tonight I shall drink myself beautiful.
How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
I am not looking for a one night stand, 2 hours will be plenty enough.
If it’s the thought that counts, then I should probably be in jail…
If Apple really want to introduce something new and "innovative" they should just release a longer charger.
I think my "check engine" light has finally burned out. So that`s good.
Sarcasm is the ability to insult stupid people without them realizing it.
Why isn’t the default for online shopping “view all”? Who likes to skip through 20 pages of only 12 items…
Everyone always wants to date the hot crazy chick.....Till you`re standing outside watching your house burn.
Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance... The five stages of waking up.
Farts are just ghosts of things that we ate. ;D
?"Cheating" is such a strong word. I rather call it "talent scouting".
I like people the most when I`m by myself.