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So exhausting to have my life changed for the better every time someone posts a screenshot of a famous quote.
Still haven`t taken down the Christmas tree. Screw it. We now have a Super Bowl tree.
Do people who run know that we’re not food anymore.
I just want to find someone who will love me for exactly who I am pretending to be.
When someone says to me great minds think alike, I just look at them and think “you dirty bastard”.
The fact that Pitbul is even considered a musician is more disgusting than the fact that toothpaste was invented years after french kissing was.
I tried my best to see things from your point a view, but your point of view is stupid.
I keep seeing studies finding fecal matter on things. Anyone considered that perhaps it`s the scientists that aren`t washing their hands?
Its sad that we live in a world that puts words into the dictionary if enough stupid people use it.
Last time I saw jugs that big, 2 hillbillies were blowing on them.
Is anyone going to tell America`s funniest videos about YouTube?
It`s called fall because everything is falling; leaves, temperature, bank account, gpa, motivation...
Eww!!! Beer does NOT taste good on Cocoa Puffs! ..I`m switching back to my Fruit Loops! ;)
Being a Zombie doesn`t sound that bad. You don`t have a job and your entire day is spent looking for things to eat. Shit, I do that now.
Sometimes I do totally awesome and amazing things just to throw people off.