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How is it possible that we have one hand that can do everything while the other hand is all, “I can’t even hold a pencil”?
If you think this status is funny someone you hate will step on a lego.
"Ho, Ho, Ho!" -Santa Claus/Pimp, doing a head count.
A man who took an Airline company to court after his luggage went missing has lost his case.
I heard an ex got run down by a bus today. I thought "Wow, that could have been me!" But then, I can`t drive a bus..
I was going to write something profound and memorable here, but I can`t remember what it was.
My fake plant died because I didn`t pretend to water it
No pants are the best pants.
May the bridges I burn light the path in front of me...
I am convinced that Kellogg`s works for our Government and all that Snap, Crackle, Pop is CODE.......
If there`s no gravity underwater, why do mermaids need those seashell bra`s?
My favorite part about your rant on how much you hate social media sites was when you posted it from a social media site.
I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell. :)
Common Sense is so rare, it should be classified as a super power.
Just another day of not being rich and famous.