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Of course size matters. No one wants a small pizza
I don`t care how smart your phone is, it`s not going to change how stupid you are.
I often wonder how things worked out for that guy who grabbed the bull by the horns.
I may not be the richest guy...or the smartest guy...or the funniest guy...or the best-looking guy...or the .....:( Forget it, now I`m depressed.
Yoga pants are just push up bras for your butt.
I can`t believe the music that kids listen to now-a-days! What ever happened to wholesome music like "Push It" and "Me So Horny"?
Am I getting older or is the supermarket starting to play some great songs?
It`s so cold outside you can see your farts.
For some people, a new year means a new chance to f*ck it up all over again.
Beer is the answer...but I can`t remember the question.
"Half a dozen" because saying `6` is way too long...
I live in fear that my death will somehow be connected to the opening of a pressurized Pillsbury cinnamon roll container.
I`m not sarcastic…I`m just intellegent beyond your understanding.
We should be thanking our Dads for bringing us into the world, not our Moms. She probably wasn`t in the mood...