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What do you call a dog with no hind legs? Dragon Balls.
There’s a very short list of things you can have in your hand while running without looking crazy.
I can come up with plenty of ways to do nothing.
Don`t you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do.
I wonder if people that live in Hawaii have screensavers of bumper to bumper traffic?
I have a million dollar idea that I will share with the first million people to send me a dollar.
You call it free samples, I call it a free all you can eat buffet.
I was cleaning one of my finger guns and accidentally blew a hole through my air guitar.
Is it considered rude to ask your boss if it hurt when the house fell on her in The Wizard of Oz?
Not every flower can say love...but a rose did. Not every plant can survive thirst...but a cactus did. Not every idiot can read, but look at you go!!!! lol
I live for those really small but special moments in life, like when I see the waiter bringing my food to the table.
Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave your house.
I just took the "What Kind of Asshole are You?" quiz and got "The kind that posts my results on Facebook".
My last boyfriend used to smile and say "I love you" to me every morning as he left for work. At least I think that`s what he was saying. It can be tricky to lip read through binoculars.
Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the music stops loading.