Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Bitches be trippin..... ok, maybe I pushed that one.
Never seen anyone jogging and smiling, so that’s all I need to know about that.
Why are kids obese? Maybe because Burgers are $.99, & Salads are $4.99.
Such a satisfying feeling when “the one that got away” turns into “dodged that bullet”
Do you ever dislike someone so much that you hate when people are nice to them?
It doesn`t take much to make a woman happy, but it takes even less to make her mad.
Guys if you ever want to imagine what a woman’s mind feels like imagine a browser with 2,859 tabs open. All. The. F*cking. Time.
I have NEVER faked a sarcasm in my life ;)
It`s really crazy that you don`t hear a round of applause every time you order a salad.
I’m taking care of my procrastination issues; just you wait and see.
Apparently, I just ate 39 servings of Tic - Tacs.
Morning workout: Turn on treadmill. Untangle headphones for 14 minutes. Get frustrated, leave and eat doughnuts.
There should be a mercy rule for how many pics a girl can upload from her vacation.
I didn`t see anyone important today, so I`ll probably wear these same clothes tomorrow.
Why get married? Just pick a girl you hate and buy her a house.