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I put the o in illiterate!
Most problems can be solved with nudity
2003: Fear that ppl from the internet will find me in real life. 2013: Fear that ppl from real life will find me on the internet.
Sometimes I pretend to be normal. But it gets boring ... so I go back to being me. ;)
Pro tip: The kids run around a little longer if you forget to hide the eggs
Reverse Psychology: DO not STALK MY FB PAGE. YOU ARE not OBSESSED WITH ME...
Before social networking you could just completely forget someone existed. And it was great
I HATE it when I get invited to weird events on Facebook. ..For the FIFTH time, I do not want to go to your cat`s birthday party. Damn it! ..My dog is getting married
Anything you say will be used against you, in an argument, 10 months from now, because I’m a woman. And we never forget. Anything. Ever.
A piΓ±ata is NOT a good idea for a Halloween costume.
Just found my TV remote and a newspaper in my fridge. It`s pretty awesome that society lets me live by myself.
The secret of enjoying a good wine: 1) Open the bottle to allow it to breathe. 2) if it does not look like it`s breathing give it mouth-to_mouth
As a Harry Potter fan, I wanted to go to Hogwarts. As a Hunger Games fan, not so much...
change your birthday on facebook to today, see how many people say happy birthday for APRIL FOOLS!!!! lol
I know my limits. I don’t pay any attention to them, but I know them