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Today one of my colleague told...... Buddy let get into serious studies... exams are on our heads.... And then both of us continued to chat with other people on fb for hours
People who try to test my patience don`t realize it`s an exam I don`t plan on passing
Girl: What color are my eyes? Guy: 34C
Friendship must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, nudity, inappropriateness, and shenanigans.
I used to be a terrible flirt ... I am much better at it now.
You win some, you lose some, and if you`re lucky, you get some.
It`s been discovered that 1% of the population is allergic to Gluten. The other 99% are sick and tired of hearing about it......
Why do people always feel safe under blankets...its not like a murderer will break in and be like "I`M GONNA KILL YAA__AAHHHhhhh dang he is under a blanket.
If he pauses a video game to text you, he`s probably already losing, no need to feel special or anything,
I hate waiting until I`m dead. I want to haunt people now dammit.
We`re like hot chocolate and marshmallows. You`re hot, and I wanna be on top of you.
Just been on a diabetes awareness website and it asked me if I accept cookies. Is that a trick question?
Holy sh!t Karma, how much longer till we`re all squared up?
Something about summertime brings out the beer guzzling Homer Simpson in me.
Friends who buy you food are friends for life.