Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
They say the key to a fitness routine is having a workout buddy and that`s why I surround myself with lazy people
Sent my ex a card that said, "Get better soon." He`s not ill, just really crappy in bed.
Thanks to Facebook i now know what everyones bathroom looks like.
You know you’re awesome when you know you’re awesome.
Before criticizing my taste, remember that I like you.
Your day sucked, huh? I`m sure Facebook would love to hear about it.
Exaggerations went up a million percent last year.
Make fun of George Bush all you want, but he would have found a way to bomb North Korea before they shut down Hollywood.
If you work Security in a Samsung store does that make you a Guardian of the Galaxy?
Abaaabbbbaaabbbaabbbaabb..... Long time no ` C ` ; P
Accidentally ran over my neighbor’s cat today and I was scared to tell him to his face so I left a note saying “Curiosity was here”
People who learned a bunch of stuff must have felt pretty stupid when Wikipedia came out.
Next time you take your dog for a walk, dress like a cop & pretend to be searching the neighborhood for drugs.
The reason I don`t play Scrabble online, is that I can`t throw the tiles at the person who beats me.
A sure cure for sea-sickness is to sit under a tree.