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You never really know someone until you break up with them. If they don’t go crazy and try to kill you than maybe you should give them a second chance.
If sex is said to be the best exercise, than why are there no fitness clubs for that. Now there`s idea. . .
With the right person, you can talk about absolutely nothing for hours & feel like you spoke about everything.
Walmart killed the traveling circus.
Be careful, there is also plenty of mentally unstable fish in the sea.
Happy Elastic Waistband Day
I`m having one of those days where my middle finger is answering every question!!!
The worst thing about renting movie from a Red Box is that a $1 late fee isn’t enough motivation to get off the couch.
When you turn 21, you can legally do all the things you`ve been doing since you were 15.
The best thing about marriage is how wives always like to joke about making sure the life insurance premiums are paid up...
I like dressing in a red polo shirt then going to Target & being rude to costumers
Never go on a blind date with a friend! She was so big when i took her home she went to my backyard and started grazing.
Putting ketchup on steak should also affect your credit score.
I always look out for #1 ... unless I`m walking thru my yard, then I look out for #2
If something`s worth doing, it`s worth doing rihgt.