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Taco Bell is donating burritos to feed firefighters in Colorado. Talk about putting gas on the fire,
With the right person, you can talk about absolutely nothing for hours & feel like you spoke about everything.
Wednesday, you’d be a lot cooler if you were Friday night.
I was a huge tomboy. Like, I had barbies, but only because my ninja turtles needed bitches.
Nothing makes you feel more insignificant than still having 85% battery at noon.
The correct answer to "How are you?" is "Fine." If you ever stray from that dialogue, please know that nobody gives a sh!t.
Well, I`m going to take a hot shower. Its like a regular shower, but with me in it.
Not clicking like on this status makes your a$$ look fat.
This is odd?!?! The hour we lost this weekend was the one when I was planning to go to the gym.
I still like going into Burger King and ordering a McWhopper and a McFry.
I wonder if I´ll ever be mature enough to use a stud finder without first pointing it at myself and saying "THERES ONE." -same guy, you`re british.
I prefer a slowie not a quickie.
Good thing I got a college degree I think as I put away the kid toys for the 49 billionth time
So today my gym was crowded...at least I think it was a gym...Do gyms usually have drive thrus?
This salad tastes like I’d rather be fat.