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You can make your life more entertaining by simply reaching out, and getting to know a whore.
A pessimist thinks that all women are sluts. An optimist hopes that they are.
In relationships, it’s important to pay attention to the person’s likes and dislikes. My parole officer, for example, hates to be tickled.
RUN? I thought you said Rum. I quit.
The reason i connot lie is because i like big butts.
I still remember the first time I lied about being able to time travel... It was 3 weeks from tomorrow.
never trust a man in a wheelchair with dirty shoes
If heat makes things expand, then I don`t have a weight problem ... I am just Hot!
I`m sorry, all I hear is your perfume
I want to know what horrific ideas were rejected before they decided "Vagisil" was the best possible brand name?
Why do people with the most to say contribute the least?
The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
Porn & love songs. Destroying reality forever.
If you`re "just sayin", then just shut the hell up.
"you failed just as much as your dads condom."