Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
WARNING:: going to bed on Sunday will cause Monday.
For all the taxes they take out of my paycheck they should at least send me a picture of the broke ass family I support to hang on my fridge.
Thinking of getting another kitchen table just for all my mail
Anything is possible when you have no clue what you`re talking about
Growing up and becoming an adult was the worst decision I’ve ever made.
One of the major benefits of using a combined 2 in 1 shampoo/conditioner is having enough room leftover on the shower caddy for the beer.
Turns out I`m ambidextrous at yet another sport! And I even scored a bingo twice. Left-handed!
Life was much easier when apples and blackberries were fruits&& not phones
How to tell if your wife is mad at you - Step 1. She is
Why am I always right but people still ignore me...?
If you get a new job before you quit your old one, it`s considered responsible. But if you do that with your gf, it`s called "cheating."
Do strippers have nightmares where they are in front of a large crowd with their clothes on?
All I want is to see you smile...that and maybe a pizza.
Beware of the deodorants with instructions that ask you to "remove the top and push up bottom"... they could at least make them round.
Trix commercials just teach kids that sharing is bad.