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The guy below me obviously doesn`t know that R2-D2 is in movies, not television
I am creating the first ever "flavored windows". They should make some of you very happy.
I will stop eating ice cream out of the container once I make it completely level.
Just bought me a medical alert bracelet that says... "probably just sh!tfaced"
Billion Dollar Idea: An app that deletes your phone number from other people`s phones.
I donβt think girls realize how handsome my mom says I am.
I saw the city workers putting up a sign on my street and it says Bumpy road ... so I put up a sign that says ,, FIX IT !
Not sure what my spirit animal is, but I am sure it has rabies
Right now my life is about as organized as the $5 DVD bin at Wal-mart.
I`m just like the ghostbusters, except I chase squirrels around my neighborhood with a vacuum cleaner
Sometimes I wrestle with my demons. Other times we just snuggle.
I`m so bitchy right now ... I won`t even talk to myself!!
My haters only have one advantage over me. They can kiss my a$$, I can`t.
It`s called NASCAR because that`s the way a hillbilly pronounces "nice car"
I took the "Which 90`s Cartoon Are You?" quiz and got "You`re a fucking grown man. Stop it. Right now."