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I need an app that shows oncoming traffic on my touchscreen while I`m driving
Well it`s about time I get in line for that Star Wars movie
To all those who received a book from me as a Christmas present, they are due back at the library today.
If jail isn`t supposed to be fun, why do they get bunk beds?
I`m no mathlete, but I CAN tell you that a 6 y/o running at 8 mph chasing an ice cream truck moving at 10 mph flies 7.4 ft if you trip him.
Today`s interpretive dance was brought to you by "Spider On My Shirt". Up next we have "Oh jeeze, where did it go?!"
I’m starting to think we as a society may be trying to do too much with the Dorito.
You know you`re desperate for an answer when you look on the second page of Google.
Nothing says lazy like laying on the couch making today`s responsibilities tomorrow`s problem.
You ever notice that the number of extra steps a drunk takes getting home? ...its staggering!
This spider just got away from me because I made the classic villain mistake of telling him my whole evil plan before killing him.
How can you tell if someone went to the gym? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
I worry about people who write "taken" in their bios. Where did they go? Who took them and why aren`t we helping to find them?
I`m going to become a hermit as soon as I find a cave with a decent wifi connection.
Today`s subliminal thought is: …