Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Iβm single by choice. Not my choice, but still a choice!
I thought my name was "Stop encouraging him" until I was 11.
If I could just make one thing very clear at this point ... I would.
Do u ever have the urge to tell someone to shut up even when they arent talking?
Please come see my theatrical dramatization of the history of puns ... It`s a play on words.
Sometimes late at night.. I dig a hole in the back yard by lantern light.. Sure keeps my nosy neighbors on their toes.. :|
I found my first grey pubic hair today. Normally things like this don`t bother me, but it was in my Big Mac.
None of my girlfriends even know they`re dating me.
I could be a morning person....if morning happened around noon.
I inherited my dad`s sense of humor. He`s not funny either.
All single ladies, stop saying you should just give up and get a cat. If no man wants you, donβt force an innocent cat to live with you.
I`m so, so sorry I started the whole Facebook Is Going To Start Charging thing. I didn`t think it would go THIS far..... sorry
If tomatoes are classed as a fruit, then doesnt that mean that ketchup is technically a smoothie? ... hmmm
Family and Friends - I am FAR too busy to listen to any of your problems or concerns *Googles do penguins go to heaven?*
Iβd steal a doughnut truck and attempt to outrun the cops, just to let people see a bunch of cops chasing a doughnut truck!