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If you take Viagra with iron supplements it will cause you spin around and point North.
When I get home the first thing I`m going to do is rip my wife`s panties off. Because they`re too small and the elastic is killing me.
So far I`m 0 for 276 for walking around the block in hopes of finding a bag of money on the side of the road.
My level of sarcasm is to a point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.
How dare you incinerate that I don`t know big words.
Roses are red, violets are blue, sandwiches are tasty, rhyming is hard
I can read your mind, your thinking about sex right now, no wait, wait.. that`s my mind, sorry, I can read my mind. . .
They say that when one door closes, another one opens. Apparently, "they" have never been to jail.
Kinda like Facebook, I wish I could β€˜hide’ people in real life.
What happens when Batman sees Catwoman? The Dark Knight Rises.
i got a dig bick..........how many read that wrong
What idiot called him Alexander Graham Bell instead of Lord of the Rings
I`m so out of shape, Internet Explorer could probably run faster than me.
I got rid of all the bad influence people in my life and now I`m bored.
If you`re crazy and you know it shake your meds...